Like many other innovations since then, the telephone was invented as a way of improving communication. The same is true of e-mail, voicemail, teleconferencing, cellphones, even the Internet. But do they truly help us connect with one another more effectively?

Avoiding personal contact

As part of a survey on communication in corporations, I interviewed CEOs of a variety of organizations. The President of a major technology company told me she was perturbed to note people who sat beside each other, separated only by a room divider, communicating with each other by e-mail instead of in person. Happy to find a senior executive who shared my concern over these trends, I asked her why that worried her. She had two reasons. First, while e-mail can be a quick and efficient way of transferring information, it does not convincingly convey a person's tone or feelings. Simply stating facts in the often terse style of e-mail can lead to misunderstanding and ill feelings. Second, using e-mail instead of walking around a corner for a quick personal conversation is a step down a slippery slope to the point where we can avoid any interpersonal relationships on the job at all—a somewhat disturbing prospect.

A number of my business acquaintances have noticed that when they arrive at the office in the morning, they typically have a line-up of voicemail messages awaiting their attention, many of which were obviously left after office hours the night before. It seems clear to me that many of these callers choose to call outside office hours for one reason—they donít want to reach a live human being. They want to leave their side of the "communication" without have to contend with the other person's response. Add to this the growing use of "Call Display"—that fiendish invention of the telephone companies that announces the caller's name before the call is answered—and the telephone becomes a barbed wire fence we can erect to keep anyone from communicating with us in person at all. Now there's progress for you, Mr. Bell!

Cell phones

My experience on a train trip illustrates how even the most convenient of the new technology can be misused. The train was standing in the station, with about fifteen minutes to go before departure time. The car was filling up with a variety of people, several with laptop computers who obviously planned to get some work done during the trip.

One man decided this would be a good time to catch up with a few phone calls, and pulled out his cellphone. For the next ten minutes, everyone in the car became privy to his business dealings as he told his associates loudly that he was on a train waiting to leave any moment, and proceeded to discuss business we had no interest in hearing.

We all suffered in pained silence, until one brave businesswoman took matters in hand. She walked down the car, leaned over Tom (we knew his name was Tom, as he announced himself with every call) and, smiling pleasantly, said, "Excuse me". When he paused in his conversation, she then explained, in a friendly, non-threatening tone, that his voice was carrying perhaps more than he realized, and asked if he would mind speaking more quietly. Apparently surprised by this, Tom finished his conversation at an acceptable volume—and didn't make any more calls during the trip.

Of course, he had been oblivious to the annoyance of the other passengers. Noisy cellphone users rarely realize they are bothering anyone—they are somewhat akin to those drivers who think they are the only ones using the road. Again, the technology is not the problem—the user is.

Teleconferences

There's no denying the value of setting up a teleconference to let people in farflung locations hold a meeting, thus avoiding high travel costs. However, I see the practice spreading so that very soon, face-to-face meetings will be the exception. That's a pity, because there are some situations in which a face-to-face, across-the-table discussion is the only way to settle issues with no room for misunderstanding or later dispute.

Certainly, ineffective meetings waste a great deal of time and money, but teleconferences are not, by definition, any better run than the traditional meeting. The problem here is the people, not the vehicle.

Where is this taking us?

Many surveys have shown that young people in high school are more and more likely to be overweight and unfit, due to the amount of time they spend in the front of their computers, playing videogames and surfing the Net. I believe physical deterioration is only part of the problem. I foresee a generation of people whose social skills are non-existent, and who will be hard pressed to become part of any kind of project team or functional group in business. Even worse, what kind of family relationships will we be looking at in the future? Will someone invent some diabolical instrument for "communication" over the dinner table, where we each have our own keypad to ask "Pass the salt, please"?

We need to keep a close eye on where communication technology is taking us.

© 2004 Helen Wilkie All Rights Reserved. You may reprint this article for your online or print publication so long as you include the complete article and the following paragraph:

Helen Wilkie is a professional speaker, consultant and author who helps companies do better business through better communication. Her latest book is "The Hidden Profit Center". To received free monthly tips and techniques on communication, visit http://www.mhwcom.com or http://www.HiddenProfitCenter.com and sign up for "Communi-keys". Reach Helen Wilkie at 416-966-5023 or hwilkie@mhwcom.com

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